I first read the poem ‘Autobiography in Five Short Chapters’ by Portia Nelson in ‘The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying’. It was way before it became such a big hit on the internet (probably because in the mid 90’s the internet was not such a big hit itself…but that’s a different story).
If you are not familiar with the poem, here it is:
Chapter One
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost … I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes me forever to find a way out.
Chapter Two
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in … it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
Chapter Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter Five
I walk down another street.
I love the simplicity of this poem and the clear and well-recognized progression that resonated with my life, as well as my students’. But for many years now, I feel there is a need for a sixth chapter, one that has made and is still making the most significant change in my life today.
A month ago, I had a meeting with Anna, a long-time executive coaching client of mine. Anna is the president of a large international manufacturing company, and we were meeting to discuss a Coaching Culture workshop that I was planning for her top executives. She had a late breakfast, and I ordered tea, and we chatted about life and her progress at work. At some point in the conversation, she mentioned in passing her love for this poem, and I shared my thought on the missing sixth chapter. Her fork stopped mid-way in the air as she was thinking about what I just shared. She paused for a long while, “Wow”, she said, “I never thought about it that way, “You are so right! There is a need for the sixth chapter…You never talked about this before. Would you teach that in our workshop too?”.
So I set down and added a sixth chapter from the perspective of an executive coach and then realized I actually needed a seventh one too:
Chapter Six
I return to the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see people inside.
Some are stuck for a long time.
I chose to go into the hole with them
I hold their hand.
I understand. I was there.
Suddenly, there is a shift.
They get out,
they walk around or
They walk down another street.
They thank me, but I know it’s really all about them.
Chapter Seven
I return to the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see people inside.
Some are stuck for a long time.
The people I helped yesterday are now with them.
They are holding their hands, they understand, they were there.
I look at them.
I smile.
I keep returning to the same street.
I am planning to share these two chapters in my next Coaching Culture workshop with Anna’s team next month,
but until then, I’d love to hear what you think…
